thinking..

Feeling really down lately. Tomorrow I’m going to educational fair..meeting up with my cousin. I’m really afraid that my mum will disagree with my decision again. I’m really not in a good state to control my anger and feelings in front of her. I’m tired of looking at her mood on this situation but yet I don’t know how to tell her that. I knows she wants the best for me, but I have a life, a road. I’m not entirely saying I don’t need her help, I want her guidance not her decision. I don’t want her to give me the look on her face and saying is up to me. There is so many to choose from. Wen used to say fine something that I’m good at…clearly I don’t know. I’m like a merchant with all trades or maybe not. I’m trying..to know what I’m good at, but I guess my tries aren’t just good enough.

Life is a combinations of keys and chords like the piano. It goes from crescendo to expressivo, dolce to allegretto never ending of ups and down. Only the person who plays and a true listener will understand.